One day it’s a hurricane and all the potential devastation that brings… Another day it’s another hurricane, more devastation. Then it’s the economy – whether Wall Street or your local gas station – your money is doing flip flops …. and it often feels like a lot more of the flop than the flip…
Food prices are up, energy prices are up … the wars are plentiful – the fighting about the war and the war dead and wounded seems endless…
The election is looming and the campaigning often takes a nasty and insulting turn… if not aimed at your favorite candidate, aimed at you – for having the favorite you have vs. the other one…
You can begin to feel angry and helpless and hopeless and exhausted… The more out of your control the world around you feels… the more anxious and angered you can become.
Feelings of hopelessness can begin to creep in… you know what they sound like…
“What’s the use?” “It doesn’t matter” “Who cares?” “What am I going to do?” “I might as well forget it!” and so on….
The bad news: You are thinking like this for a reason – perhaps many reasons… You are feeling this way because you are on overload…
The good news: The more aware you are of your tendency to have these thoughts and feelings- the more you are able to sooth and strengthen yourself and fight back!
1- List the words you use when you are feelings hopeless. [Keep this list in a handy place – it will be easier for your to identify what’s going on with you if you have a physical list to review. ]
2- Identify and list the feelings you have when you are feeling hopeless. [As noted above, keep this list in a handy place – it will be easier for you to identify what’s going on with you if you have a physical list to review.]
3- Remind yourself, out loud if necessary, that you have had these thoughts and feelings in the past and you have survived. [This is important because in the heat of the moment, it will be easy to forget this critical fact.]
4- Allow yourself the compassion of accepting that you are human and that your fears are human. [For too many, this is hard to do, but it is the truth.]
5. Remind yourself that you are not “going crazy.” [It may feel that way, but you are not!]
6 . List 3 people you can call who will be able to provide comfort. [Not the people who will try to “out sad” you – you know the type – no matter what is going on in your life, it’s worse for them. This is not the person you need to talk to now!]
7. List 3 activities in which you can engage that will reduce your stress. [Make these activities small, inexpensive, something you can do on a moment’s notice]
8. Create 1-3 affirmations you will use to remind yourself of the need to approach your fears a little bit at a time – vs. trying to resolve/change the entire concern.
9. Practice turning complicated tasks into smaller tasks. [e.g. Instead of thinking about having to clean the entire house – think about giving yourself 15 minutes to straighten one room. This will not clean the entire house – but each time you are able to put 1 small part of the house cleaning “to bed” you are strengthening your experience of being successful.]
10. Give yourself break time – it is okay to feel sorry for yourself as long as you don’t take an extended bath in the sorrow. Just as with any bath – if you stay in too long, you can come out shriveled and wrinkled – and feeling weakened.