"Making It Make Sense" (SM) with Dr. Pamela Brewer
ATTACK ! ON AMERICA 9.11
by Pamela Brewer
1. THE NATION IS HAVING A GRIEF REACTION.
2. THE NATION IS THE VICTIM OF A VIOLENT CRIME.
3. WE ARE ALL EXPERIENCING SHOCK AND ANGER.
4. YOU MAY EXPERIENCE INCREASED MOOD INTENSITY.
5. YOU MAY FEEL PANIC, OUT OF CONTROL? HELPLESSNESS? ALL NORMAL REACTIONS.
6. YOU MAY BE FEELING DISORGANIZED AND FRIGHTENED? NORMAL REACTION.
7. YOU MAY HAVE INCREASED THOUGHTS REGARDING YOUR MORTALITY AND THE MORTALITY OF THOSE YOU CARE ABOUT THIS IS A NORMAL REACTION.
8. IT IS CRITICAL THAT YOU HEAR YOURSELF. ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR VARYING THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT THIS TRAGEDY.
9. "BEING STRONG" INCLUDES BEING HUMAN. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO GO ABOUT YOUR DAY AS THOUGH NOTHING HAS HAPPENED. SOMETHING HAS HAPPENED! DON'T SPEND YOUR ENERGY PRETENDING.
10. LISTEN TO AND ACKNOWLEDGE THE FEARS OF CHILDREN AND THE ELDERLY.
11. DO NOT TRY TO FIX WHAT CAN NOT BE FIXED.
12. DEVELOP SYSTEMS/ACTIVITIES THAT WILL HELP YOU TO FEEL SAFE.
13. REACH OUT FOR SUPPORT.
14. CONSISTENCY WILL BE IMPORTANT FOR CHILDREN... TO CALM THEIR AND YOUR SENSE OF UNCERTAINTY.
15. KEEP TO AS MANY REGULAR SCHEDULES AS POSSIBLE.
16. VOLUNTEERING/HELPING OTHERS CAN BE ENORMOUSLY HELPFUL IF YOU CAN TOLERATE IT.
17. TRY TO TAKE A BREAK FOR YOURSELF. A HOT BATH, A WALK , A HOBBY; WHATEVER WORKS FOR YOU THAT IS HEALTHY. DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR OR INCREASED SUBSTANCE USE IS NOT HEALTHY.
18. DEEP, SLOW BREATHING CAN BE ENORMOUSLY CALMING.
19. BECAUSE WE ARE A NATION IN SHOCK, IN ANGER, IN BEWILDERMENT... WE MUST ALL GIVE OURSELVES TIME TO REFLECT AND HEAL.
HOW TO TELL IF YOU MAY BE IN TROUBLE
If you have any of these experiences, PLEASE seek immediate professional help.
FLASHBACKS.
EXTREME AGITATION.
SUBSTANCE ABUSE/INCREASED SUBSTANCE USE.
FEELING HARMFUL TOWARDS YOURSELF OR OTHERS.
IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE IN TROUBLE.
ANGER MANAGEMENT By Pamela Brewer, MSW, Ph.D., LCSW-C
As we now work to move forward, and ?settle in? to an awareness of our new future, it is important to focus on self-care. We can do little for others if we forget to care for ourselves. As the shock now begins to be laced with anger, it is important to understand our anger and what to do with the feelings. Here are some ways to think about self-care:
Anger and hurt are flip sides of the same coin. If you are feeling hurt ? in all likelihood you are experiencing anger. Because we have been socialized to believe that the feeling of power is preferable to the feeling of vulnerability ? we often opt for the anger.
Anger is a normal, natural human emotion.
You can choose to act on your anger or not. Even as we experience anger over the attack on America, it is important to participate in your daily routines as much as possible. Do not minimize your pain or compare your pain to others. Ultimately, this will exacerbate your feelings of internalized anger and shame.
Continue to reach out to the children and actively listen to their thoughts. Let them know that it is okay to feel angry or fearful or both.
Develop a plan to be in touch with people you care about on a regular basis. Express your range of emotions. Do not forget to find joy in small things - the rain, the sun, a smile - they can bring great pleasure. Continue with your appropriate health routines. · Do not use this as a time to engage in substance abuse.
· Pay attention to your own safety needs.
· Do not allow your fear to turn to rage to turn into excuses to harm others.
· Turn to writing in a journal as one of the tools you use for self-expression.
· Do not try to deny the effects of the recent trauma on your emotional/ social functioning.
· Avoid making significant life decisions right now - if possible.
· For those who have experienced past traumas this may be a more difficult time you may wish to work with a mental health professional.
· Anger is often a defense against hurt.
If you feel your anger growing to the point that you want to harm yourself or others. Seek professional assistance now.