Children And Loss
TALKING TO A CHILD ABOUT LOSS
EXAMPLES OF SIGNIFICANT LOSS EXPERIENCES
FOR CHILDREN
MOVING TO A NEW HOME
LOSS OF A SENSE OF SAFETY
LOSS OF STRUCTURE
MOVING TO A NEW SCHOOL
SUDDEN CHANGE IN FAMILY FINANCIAL STATUS
DEATH
LOSS OF A PET
SUDDEN HEALTH CHANGES FOR SELF/FAMILY/FRIENDS
DIVORCE
IT IS NOT USEFUL TO...
… ASSUME THE CHILD IS TOO YOUNG TO EXPERIENCE LOSS
…TRY TO FIX THE FEELINGS
…TRY TO “REPLACE” THE LOSS
…ASSURE THE CHILD THAT “TIME WILL MAKE IT GO AWAY”
…ENCOURAGE THE CHILD TO “BE STRONG”
… TELL THE CHILD NOT TO “FEEL BAD”
… TELL THE CHILD TO “KEEP BUSY”
… ASSURE THE CHILD THAT THE LOVED ONE “LED A FULL LIFE”
IT IS USEFUL TO...
… TALK ABOUT THE LOSS
… ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR OWN EXPERIENCES WITH LOSS
… LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD’S FEELINGS ABOUT THE LOSS
….ASK QUESTIONS
IT IS NORMAL FOR A CHILD TO...
…DREAM ABOUT THE LOSS
…BEGIN TO WORRY ABOUT HIS/HER OWN CARE/MORTALITY
…TRY TO “TAKE CARE OF” THE ADULTS/OTHERS-BUT NOT HEALTHY FOR THE CHILD OR THE ADULT.
WHAT TO DO
… ALLOW CHILD TO EXPRESS SORROW
…ALLOW CHILD TO TALK ABOUT PAST AND FUTURE HOPES AND DREAMS; GOOD TIMES AND BAD
…TALK ABOUT THE FEELINGS
… INITIATE CONVERSATION WITH THE CHILD
… MODEL THE EXPRESSION OF FEELINGS FOR CHILD