Abuse Checklist
KEEPING YOU AWAY FROM OTHER PEOPLE
- Does your partner get angry when you talk on the phone?
- Does your partner open your mail without your permission?
- Does your partner keep you from seeing friends?
- Is your partner angry when you are just a little late getting home?
- Does your partner require you to be home at the hour he/she determines?
ALWAYS ON YOUR MIND
- Do you worry about what your partner will think of your appearance?
- Do you ask your partner who you can go see or where you can go?
- Are you careful of what you say so that your partner will not get upset?
- Do you feel you are “walking on eggshells”?
PUTTING YOU DOWN: HUMILIATION
- Does your partner call you names like “stupid”, “bitch”, or “whore”?
- Does your partner tell you what is “wrong” with you in front of other people?
- Has your partner made you do things about which you feel ashamed?
- Does your partner say that no one else would want you or love you?
- Does your partner blame you for everything “bad” or “wrong” in the relationship?
THREATS
- Does your partner threaten to leave you as a way to exercise control?
- Has your partner said that he/she would go crazy or kill him/herself if you leave?
- Does your partner say you will be hit or hit you if you don’t obey or disagree?
- Does your partner threaten to tell others intimate details about you/your relationship?
- Does your partner threaten to tell others untruths about you?
FEELING SICK AND TIRED
- Does your partner keep you up late badgering you about past relationships?
- Do you work so hard to please your partner that you feel worn out?
- Do you feel sick, yet you are not sure what is wrong?
- Are you unable to do things you used to do easily?
- Is your self-esteem feeling shattered?
"SMALL" DEMANDS
- Does your partner demand that dinner be served ring on the minute?
- Does your partner insist that the house look “just so”?
- Do you have to report how you spend every dollar?
SWEET TALK AND THREATS
- After your partner has been mean is he/she sweet and loving?
- After your partner has hit you does your partner give you a present or take you out?
- When you decide to leave does your partner give you hope for change?